The very best medicine

I wasn’t planning on writing about internet culture two blogs in a row, but something has come to my attention that I feel I must point out.laughter

We as a society are using acronyms too much, more specifically: lol. We all know that “lol” means “laugh out loud,” but how often when we use that acronym are we actually laughing out loud? There are so many different synonyms for “laugh” that when we stick to one form, our language becomes as dry as a vagina made out of construction paper. Diversification of the English vernacular is a great thing, and I suggest we try it. Here are some synonyms for “laugh” brought to you by thesaurus.com:

  1. break up
  2. burst
  3. Cachinnate
  4. cackle
  5. chortle
  6. chuckle
  7. convulsed
  8. crack up
  9. crow
  10. fracture
  11. giggle
  12. guffaw
  13. howl
  14. roar
  15. roll in the aisles
  16. scream
  17. shriek
  18. Shit a brick
  19. snicker
  20. snort
  21. split one’s sides
  22. titter
  23. whoop
  24. be in stitches

Not only do we over use the word “lol chickenlaugh,” we overuse the entire phrase which became a cliché in 2001. many people use “lol” even when something is only worth a chortle or a snicker at best, like lolcatz. Then, there are the people on facebook or Twitter who use lol to signify that they are joking. But that could go horrible wrong. for example

Matt Fo’ Sho’ Diggle wrote: hey bro hows it hanging lol

Stevie-Bizzle Wizzle wrote: nuthin lol hows u lol

Matt Fo’ Sho’ Diggle wrote: just getting ready to go to a kickass party wanna come?

Stevie-Bizzle Wizzle wrote: No

Matt Fo’ Sho’ Diggle wrote:why?

Stevie-Bizzle Wizzle wrote: BECAUSE YOUR MOM IS A FLABBY OLD PILE OF USED CONDOMS, AND I WOULD RATHER SUCK OFF A HORSE WITH AIDS THAN HANG OUT WITH YOU!!! Lol, j/k. I’ve got a date

Matt Fo’ Sho’ Diggle wrote: FUCK YOU ASSHOLE!!!!

Stevie-Bizzle Wizzle wrote: what? I said lol

Matt Fo’ Sho’ Diggle and Stevie-Bizzle Wizzle are no longer friends

Comments:

Greg-greg-bo-beg-banana-fana-fo-feg-me-

my-mo-meg –Greg wrote:

lol queers

side note- in my head Matt Fo’ Sho’ Diggle and Stevie-Bizzle Wizzle are both white.

Sure, if something is so funny that “lol” no longer covers it, we have “lmao.” But still, there is such a vast array of stupidly funny and funnily stupid stuff on the internet that we need more that two acronyms. Here are my solutions.

  1. Lois (laughing on the inside)
  2. Lqtms (laughing quietly to myself-this was thought up by Demetri Martin, not me)
  3. Gi (giggle insanely)
  4. Sab (shitting a brick)
  5. Cbilsh (crying because I am laughing so hard)
  6. Ci (chuckling ironically)
  7. Sf (snickering feverishly)
  8. Llhlj (laughing like Heath Ledger’s “Joker”)Jokers
  9. Lljnj (laughing like Jack Nicholson’s “Joker”)
  10. Lotoswicotis (laughing on the outside while I’m crying on the inside)
  11. Lmfao…gbc! (laughing my fat ass off…Good bye cellulite!)
  12. Clae (convulsing like an epileptic)
  13. Hwl (howling with laughter)
  14. Claob-imw (cackle like an old bitch-I mean witch)
  15. Hsismscaa! (Holy shit! I’ve split my sides, call an ambulance!)
  16. Glcag (guffawing like Crabbe and Goyle)
  17. Glafsg (giggling like a flirtatious school girl)
  18. Roflyof (rolling on the floor like you’re on fire)

Feel free to use any of these, and if you have any more, please let me know.

Peace of pie

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1 Comment

  1. Man this is so true! i’m guilty of sticking to about five or six of the same boring expressions for laughter. i end up using them a lot because if not every uptight asshole on the planet wants to take everything i say as the gospel. even when i’m simply blowing smoke up their arse. number 11 was my favorite.


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